Yet another Sunday

Guess what...

It's a bloody Sunday again...
Yeah and I got a runny nose and a temper and I just want to run away.

I've been thinking about life, the universe and everything. People say money doesn't bring happiness and all I can say to that is BULL SHIT. I seriously hope some self righteous asshole is going to stumble on this and comment. Yeah some sodding bleeding heart should really come and post here and tell me about the things money can't buy and the happiness to be found in nature and god's sun and all that bullshit.

I live in a city bitch. This means there's no nature to speak off and if there is I need to either walk there or pay money to get there. But... but I hear you say it's just 1.40 for the metro ticket isn't it? Look... 1.40 is also my lunch on a work day Mrs bleeding heart. So yeah I want money. Lots of money.

Money equalls freedom. Money equalls choice. And now I've opened myself up to the self proclaimed anarchist liberators, who will, if they find the blog, tell me theories about godamned equality and revolution and other paparies (sorry this is not translatable, bollocks is close though).
As long a people are involved no way of goverment will ever be fair or equal, cause humans are assholes and egoists. Scream as much as you want about selfsacrificing heroes of religion or politics. People look to please themselves first and foremost. Unless other things are at play, like religious fever, where they will shove their piety and good deeds down your throat, if of course you will applaud and bend the knee to the divinity of their choice.
Political fervour is no much better. Do as I say, never pick at details of what I do and bend the knee. (Anarchists are not excluded from this. Instead of bending the knee to one person I'd have to bend the knee to the committee).

So yeah I call BullShit. And also just so it's clear I won't bend the knee asshats. Never to no one. And for no other reason than I got a huge ego and I admit it. I know I have it and I won't dress it up with nice, trendy words about love and revolution and happiness and all that crap.

So now I suppose you expect a song yes? Ok then

The road to hell...

There we are again. So what would you call the emotional state of a scribe? An elevator. Up and down. Up and down. Currently going down. The good thing is if you are down there is only one way to go. At least I hope so.

A quick update on my projects. I am slogging along with the novel. I write and pretend to write and smile and go yay! and then I go boo! We shall see, what we shall see.

The R1 is happy sitting in the corner looking at the other kids play. Seriously I am starting the whining part of this project. Which of course ends only with the end of the project. Lets hope my loved ones won't up and run away... I will be drawn kicking and screaming through yet another project. I am incorrigible. *shakes head*

The weather is nice and warm but also cool and breezy. We also have had some rains, which for me is superb weather. I never go swimming in the sea near my city as it is filthy and there are too many people around. The main thing is not to hear "There she blows!" while swimming. ;) I love the sea but I prefer a healthy distance between me and other humans or other beings in general (misanthrope attack). So I do not mind rain. The more the better.

And that's it I think for today, I got no other news

Heart of gold

There I start with a song! What a weekend! I kinda drifted between excitement, fear, worry, exultation, embarrassment, worry, avoidance, grinning madly and back again (not a very stable person indeed).

So on Friday my friend had a party for the publication of her first fiction book http://hildapapadimitriou.gr/ It's in greek and we've been nagging her to translate it in English as I know people, some with spikes, some without would love it. It's a mystery, a music detective story, called For A Handful Of Vinyl Records. It's an interesting book because you can walk the streets she is describing and listen to the music of the book. The book is exploding with music. Someone is killing off record collectors, vinyl records. Every chapter starts with some lyrics, and there are a lot of references that music lovers can enjoy. Also the characters are real and have real passions and real reactions. Then of course there is the essential Athenian feel of the people. You know these people, you might be these people. I enjoyed the book and I guess that it shows.

So she had a party where her friends turned up, and boy we filled the cafe that the party was taking place in and we spilled in the plaza. There was drinking and dancing and hugs! Wonderful warm hugs from people I really like and I hope they like me. As a tactile person I adore hugs. It's the feeling of being engulfed by someone else, allowed within in a way. And I know about quality hugs. There's the Oh hi ones, and then there's the OMG I AM SO GLAD TO SEE YOU ones. Well I got plenty of the second kind. And i was embarrassed a bit from things but i kinda deserved it and the person that did it likes me a lot, so all's well.

Saturday was supposed to be a day of meeting people, persons, individuals, but it fell through, so I got stuck at home, with my bff at her home chatting with me on msn. Saturday kinda shorta definitely sucked.

Now Sunday i got to meet my PhD prof (yeah i am a busy little bee) and he is wonderful and awesome and clever and has been exactly that all the 15 years I've known him. I'm going to present a paper at a convention he decreed. Eeeek! goes my scarddy heart. Still... Hell yes!! Finally something worthy, something that will return value to me. It was a good meeting indeed and I felt what i always get near him. I felt more clever. I don't know if you have noticed it but when you talk to certain people they bring you up to their level and boy it's exhilarating.

My to do list then consists of the following

• finish my god-damned book by the end of July
• get a draft paper to my prof by the end of July
• inform my supervisor of the meeting with my prof
• love the people i love as intensely as I can
• and keep that feeling of being wanted of being thought special of being accepted near cause i am going to need it.

I know Hear of gold is a N. Young song but J.Cash owns most the songs he ever told. Sorry Hilda. :)

look at me smiling, grinning, giggling. happy happy bs

Yeah!

I started writing here again because I wanted to make sure I felt good about something. So I said "Only good thoughts and feelings here. Find something that makes you happy and write about it" Ha! I've been feeling crappy these few days. I got told off on facebook by a lady because I used the word fuck in a status update. FUCK! there I used it again.... Not that anyone reads this, so that they will be offended, but FUCK! nevertheless. If you are one of the poor souls, that I twist the arms into reading this don't worry I won't get all scatological. SHIT! FUCK!

Heh! Just kidding.

Then of course is how I made a 13 year old unfriend me. Yeah world I rock! All I can think now is who goes next... maybe Kat or the tree or the hog... or maybe even .... eek! Never mind I won't take you with me into my paranoia vortex. Lets see what I can do to make this even a bit pleasant, without resorting to cute kitteh pictures.

I watched a film last night. It's called Wasabi and stars Jean Reno. It was fun. Not a masterpiece but Reno can hold his shit together very well. It's a good film to burn some minutes of your life on. A word of caution, it contains violence and violence and silly bits.

I taped my niece (or is it recorded) dancing while watching songs on tv. She's a toddler and she's cute and I felt good watching her dance.

I really hate posts that are just made so that I can keep a promise to myself. Oh I should probably mention I started working on my book again. Yes, I am writing a book. No, I do not think it is a masterpiece and no, I do not introduce myself as an author. Authors are people who've had books actually published. and I don't mean vanity press. Someone paid them for the honour of publishing their book.

I should probably bring this horrible post to an end and it will happen just about now, right after I link you to the Flickr page of an amazing young photographer. Barbie introduced me to his work.

Tell me why I don't like Sundays

Here I am...

Me-Inertia 1-0.

It might not seem such an important thing to just make one post per week but for me it is huge. Go on, go "WTF?", what do I care? Anyway lets talk about something interesting...

hmmm.. interesting... hmm...

I know! Lets talk about Spring that has finally arrived to my city. By the way I am being quite literate here because there's no metaphorical spring to be had here at all (setting fire to people on an open air market doesn't induce a sense of rebirth, unless we are talking about phoenixes. The same goes about killing a person to get a video camera. Sucks big time to live in my city)

Spring, the season, now! Well warm weather, slow breezes, sunlight and a sense of calmness, unless you stop to think about shit... Ahem! Calmness I say! A sense that your skin is the appropriate clothing for your body, as if you need nothing else. Perfect temperature and light that seems bright but not searing like the summer light. Summer light hits your eyeballs like a sledge hammer going straight to the retina. Spring light on the other hand while being bright and illuminating everything in detail, seems polite, as if.... Oh I got it! As if it's a piece of luminous silk that engulfs objects and people. I think I can live with that metaphor.

So I was sitting on my bed today with the balcony doors open, typing happily away and avoiding to think of anything that would make me anxious, sad, nervous or right down scared (i got lots of things like that, living in this country (city) at this point in time). I felt as near as I can get to being in Lothlorien... Because as you are now going to find out I got a thing about Lothlorien as depicted in the books and the films. I want to move there. I don't know what the Elves would do with a short fat human female but man i'd love to walk in those groves and sleep under the canopy of green.

Spring! Calm! Trees! the end!